this has never been done before!
—no! we are, in fact, at the cutting edge of cocking about.
you got me to that place of secret abandon.
peering through my steely gaze
with glimpses of bright eyes and private giggles
i was never one to bear my soul
to overflow with vulnerability or innocence
and I don’t mean to a crowded room
or a family dinner
even to myself
to submit to such sophomoric expressions of child’s love seemed like a sin
my world consisted of future ambitions
and know, you’ve got me telling people I’m a closet romantic.
You opened a cavalcade of storybook joy
Seemingly smothered by societal interpretations of adolescence
Of which, I aptly rejected
Just like the stereotype I unknowing filled –
You also broke my fucking heart, you fucktard.
But that’s ok.
I still think about your fears and anxieties,
Your subconscious kidnapping your decency within childhood experiences of anguish and pain
Morphed into a prescription
And presented in my fragile mind as excuses for acting like a fucking dick.
But still, a glimpse of that precious world latched itself to my rib cage ( cynicism scootched over a bit)
I still hope that you will find someone
Someone who you might someday deserve
who will open your damn eyes
To how mind-blowing beautiful you could be.